The grass is always greener...

I went outside today while Lauren was napping and the two big kids were in the pool to weed my garden. It's so bad out there and I put it off for so long its going to take a while to get it done. Bill has his chiefs coming over on Friday and I'd like to make the yard look less white trashy. So as Im out front I see my next door neighbor come out with his girlfriend and I start thinking to myself how jealous I am to see them carefree ready to get on his Harley and go for a ride! I wish I could just take off on a ride in the middle of the day instead of worrying about whether or not Mason is drowning his sister or vice-versa! Then I really get to thinking....isnt that what they are working on? That's the point of all that dating and free spirit crap...to get married and drown in a sea of shitty diapers. I spent the best years of my life in my late teens and early twenties crying over guys that dumped me or simply stupid dates that turned out to be nothing. Why didnt I cherish those days more? Or for me right now the bigger question is why am I having a hard time enjoying the fact that everything I wanted so badly back in the day has come true!! I wanted nothing more than a man who takes care of me and my babies. But here I sit complaining about wanting to come and go as I please. Well its time to feed the minions and get off to my kickboxing/bootcamp classes tonight.