Easter

It has been one hell of a week leading up to Easter. The damn kids were off all week from school and the man beast took leave..it was a constant battle to keep the house clean. I had to leave a list on the fridge and threaten physical violence for it all to get done by the time I got home at 3. Last Saturday I came home from work at 7pm to find a disaster. needless to say and im gonna say it anyway i was PISSED. I got more housework done between 7and 9pm than all four of them got done all day. No effing way was that going to happen again. Everyday there has been so many things packed into each 24 hours. Did i do it to myself? Perhaps. Regardless, Im hoping this week will chill the fuck out.



So here I sit at 830 am on Easter morning. The kids got into their Easter baskets (which I finally shopped for just 12 hours ago) and did their Egg Hunt. Now they are fueling up on candy goodness so they can act like little bastards during Church. My parents are here. I was so relieved when they showed up, because I know my mom will get the stimulation she needs here. The relief was short lived.
EDIT: HALF HOUR LATER hell just broke loose. I discovered half of what was packed for my mom was dirty and there were two sleeping pills rolling around in her bag. She has been taking three pills each night instead of two so now Dad has to dole them out. I told him that three of her shirts were dirty and he got mad at Mom but it's now his job to make sure she has the proper clothing packed for a trip. so then he yells at me OK ITS ALL MY FAULT IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR?? well yes and no. thats the answer. ugh my heart just hurrrrrts.
Going to try and make the best of the day now. right now im just hungry and very anxious. My anxiety has been teetering on the cusp of all out panic attack. Im breathing..in and out. hopefully the 9 miles I have to do after church will lift some of this weight off me. My father wont saymuch to me now, he's angry at the world. I realize this is not the life he had in mind for himself, after all who the fuck envisions their golden years taking care of a wife with Alz?
I gotta eat and get ready for some Hallejuah good time with the Lord.